Looking after yourself is hard work, we are so busy focusing on what everyone else things of us, or what we have done, or even just looking for the future and the what ifs, we forget all about ourselves. We are exceptional at rallying, when we feel low and have to do something, we rally to be the best we can, we push through it and do what we need to. The problem with this is that despite us thinking we are doing the right thing, and doing what others want, we are not listening to what we want, what our bodies need and how we feel about that. As part of my series, these 5 tips are to help you live a happier, healthier, calmer life where you don't have to feel the pressure of others but fundamentally you look inside yourself and consider your feelings first, just like you consider others on how you behave. This time the focus is on you and your considerations and the care you have for others, now starts at home and with you and your heart.
Accept that some People won’t like you
Might sound brutal and harsh but quite frankly. You can change how you see things, you react to things, how you do anything you like, but you cannot control someone else opinion, you cant make everyone like you, you don't need to try either. This is just life, not everyone will like you, just like you may not like everyone or find that they 'niggle' you. Accept that you are you, you are fabulous, you are amazing and you like you, and thats all that matters. Liking yourself, loving yourself is the most important thing in your life. Knowing this and letting all the others opinions drop to the floor so you can just focus inwards on yourself and who you are. Be YOUR own friend, and when you truly are your own friend, loving your own company, you will interestingly find out, more people will gravitate to you anyway, but thats because you have accepted who you are and are not threatened by their opinion.
Being present and being kind is simple, its free, it doesn't take anything and yet many don't. Being able to be grateful for simple things, allows you to focus in on more things. Doesn't have to star big, but start. wake up every day and say 1 thing you are grateful for, could be for a bright crisp day, good be having a good nights sleep or feeling happy. Find something to be grateful about and then when you have got 1 a day formed, then you increase it to 2 then 3. if you can have 3 points to be grateful for everyday, this will automatically start to bring a sense of warmth and happiness into yourself and you will start to feel better everyday and love how that feels more and more.
Write Down Your Successes
Similar to the above but this is directly about what you have achieved, and how great you are. Whether thats, completing the mountain of ironing just done, or the promotion you received, or a new course you have just done or learnt. It doesn't have to be big but list out things you feel you have succeeded on. A cake baked, a book finished, a run completed etc These are all great successes. We have all succeeded in many ways and its important to recognise this, and embrace the small things not just the big things. Everything is a success in one way or another. We just have to find them and accept that we had them and be proud of them. Being aware of your successes big and small, is a great vessel to improve your self love and happiness. It may sounds simple but we humans are excellent at giving compliments but accepting them, well we just bat them away with 'oh don't be silly', its often seen as being big headed or arrogant. It isn't, its accepting you have talent, you have worked hard to be you and you should stand tall and be proud of what you have done.
Feel Your Feelings
Might sound like a silly thing, but take a moment and find your breath, centre your feet in the ground and start focusing on your breathing, letting your lungs fill with air, and then exhale and let it all go. This simple technique is the beginning to really understanding your own feelings work and allowing you the time to get in touch. We have such busy lives we can go days without actually taking a moment to sit with ourselves and understand how we feel, is it happy, angry, upset, content, calm, anxious, worried... We are complex humans and have an array of emotions that vary almost every second of everyday and react because of day to day life, so its important to stop and tune in to how we feel and really absorb that. Once you have accepted how you feel, then its your chance to do something about it, cry, speak up, let it out, let it go, move on to a new emotion, let it sit there and be absorbed. We are often too scared to actually be honest with ourselves, yet we expect it from others, which seems unfair when we wont admit our own feelings? So we have to start with ourselves first and understand how and what they are, and then we can start to determine what helps, what doesn't, etc The more we know about our feelings, the better we are to move through our day to day with minimal stress in our lives as we no longer let the big stuff get to us, as its not ladened with other issues we have hidden underneath. Being in touch with your feelings allows you to live life easily and without stress so that you can really enjoy the part of life that matter and embrace all the positive in a much more clearer and stress free way.
Take up a Hobby
Hobbies help open your mind, they help you meet like minded people and expand your creative side. They invoke happy feelings and can assist in reducing anxiety and stress levels, which can if not taken into consideration, will take over and instead of working for you, will work against you and can spiral out of control. Ultimately hobbies are a great way to improve your life and happiness as they allow you to do the very thing that makes you happy. Making the time to do this, will increase your wellbeing and happiness and self confidence, which glows within like a fire. Light up the room with your passion and feel the warmth around you.